Things That Plague Me

20 Feb


Things currently plaguing me in no particular order:

-Everyone on Teen Mom has super white teeth, yet a minimal number of them use any form of birth control.

-Yesterday, on the highway, a man was going 10 miles below the speed limit in the fast lane. He dutifully showed me his middle digit,when I was behind him, by waving it around in the direction of the rear windshield with his arm fully extended in my direction. I guess he did not appreciate me kindly encouraging him to speed up by arduously pressing my gas pedal. I consider my attempt to actually show him how to drive on the highway an act of public service. You can thank me later.

-Allie is too long and/or skinny for all of her jeans. Where can I sign up for that? Do they make that in a cream I can rub all over my bod? If I sit close enough to her continuously, will it seep through my pores via osmosis?

-My boyfriend looks super handsome when his face is stubbly, yet he has to shave often for work. He looks super handsome with a smooth face as well. But winter stubble is nice.

-Allie is turning 8 soon. I’m sad she’s getting older, and that one day she may not want to sit in my lap or think I’m nice and funny. Yet I’m also proud that she’s such an awesome little girl. Also, as I typed this, she just told me she thought someone was “talking out of their A!” She obviously meant the curse word, but only said the letter. I’m slightly puzzled. While I have accidentally let a few bad words fly in front of her, I’ve never said that phrase.


-I have the best mom. Above is her posing with her Lil’ Bow Wow Christmas gag gift. She lives 10 hours away, and I miss her. I love her. She’s so funny. I call her almost everyday on my way home from work. This reassures me that even if Allie dislikes me when she is a teenager, she will one day come back around to the realization of my overall level of awesome.

-I graduate in 72 days. I’m ready to be back in grown up mode. I’m too old for student mode.


One Response to “Things That Plague Me”

  1. Heather Steele March 3, 2013 at 4:22 am #

    I’m glad to see Jan loved the beautiful piece of art you purchased for her on one of our more exotic outings. I seriously regret not buying the other gigantic painting we so admired for my sister as a wedding gift. It would have looked so much better hanging in her lavish living room than the piece of couples photography trash she has there now. #missed opportunities.

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